Chapter 28 – Bittersweet
I do not own Twilight, SOA, or anything youtube related.
“Mornin’.” Jax murmured and Bella nestled up against him.
The outlaw smiled and ran a soothing hand along her back. He love moments like these… Waking up with his old lady curled up against him and with that tired little grin. He hadn’t seen her this peaceful, in quite sometime. They’d been here for a little for a little over six weeks now. They were getting to know each other all over again. Both shared that feeling of déjà vu and couldn’t get enough. They talked about their favorite movies, music, their friends, and family. Jax felt as if he knew the Phantoms, like the back of his hand now and the feeling was mutual when it came to Bella and the Sons. She learned things about her uncle and gramps that she never even knew. They held nothing back and talked like they’d known each other all their lives and that’s how it truly felt.
One of the Sons had dropped by a couple weeks ago but they hadn’t a clue who. They were at the pond at the time. Whoever it was left the supplies behind, without as much as a note. Jax figured that to be Happy or Juice’s doing, it was a very them thing to do. But their supplies were running low again and they’d just a couple bottles of water left. Jax was beginning to worry, considering Opie promised to send someone out every couple weeks, or so. Whatever food that was left had rotted and they couldn’t eat it. Jax and Bella found a way of catching some fish at the pond and had been eating on that for the past three to four days. Bella rolled on out of the pew and was quick to head outside. Jax chuckled knowing she must’ve needed to pee really badly.
He jumped to his feet however and grabbed his gun as he heard Bella scream. Jax darted outside the church. Bella was beside one of the trees, bare-assed, on the ground, with a rattlesnake in hand. She had a tight hold around its neck and was looking to Jax in a panic. Jax cringed knowing it must’ve caught her by surprise when she squatted down to pee. She lucked out catching it the way she did. The snake was writhing about in her hold and Bella was freaking out. “Mind helping me out here?! PLEASE?!” He would’ve laughed if it wasn’t for the seriousness of the situation. Jax rushed on over and used his knife to cut its head off. The embarrassment was written all over her face. Bella had landed in her own urine, in order to get away from the rattler. Jax helped his old lady to her feet and she was quick to pull up her pants. They were caked in mud, grass, and urine.
“Yeah… damn thing went right for my vag!”
Jax couldn’t help but to chuckle.
“So not funny.”
“Sorry. But if I was a snake that’s the first place I’d go for too.” He taunted and Bella let out a nervous laugh.
“Only you Jax.”
“Nah, I’m sure there’s a line of men that would say the same.”
Jax raised his brows as he couldn’t believe the irony of his words.
“Speaking of which…” He murmured as the Scot himself was pulling up, in the SAMCRO van.
Chibs parked the van and hopped on out. Jax walked on over and greeted him with a handshake and hug. Bella gave a mere wave but kept her distance. Chibs reared back on this.
“What’s with ye? Too good ta give me a hug?!”
“Yep!” She teasingly replied but Jax chuckled as he knew the real reason behind that.
“Have it yer way, ya snob!” Chibs called then popped a cigarette into his mouth.
Bella kicked the bottom portion of the snake. The lynx was passing by when he caught it and went on to eat it. Bella laughed.
“Well I guess it’s not everyday someone catches your breakfast for you. You’re welcome!” She witted and the lynx lay down and took his time with that snake.
Jax and Bella froze however as Chibs strutted on over and hunkered down. He went on to pet the lynx and the lynx rubbed his head against the palm of Chibs’s hand. Chibs retrieved some sort of treat from his cut and fed it to the lynx.
“How ye doin’ ole Bob?” He asked and the lynx was begging for even more attention.
“Pet of yours?” Jax taunted and Chibs chuckled.
“Ole Bob’s been livin’ here fur quite sometime now.”
Bella inched her way over and held out her hand. The lynx sniffed it then went back to gathering Chibs’s attention.
“Serves ya right. Couldn’t even say hi.” Chibs muttered under his breath.
The Scot caught a whiff of Bella nevertheless then looked to her pants, where the scent was coming from.
“Did ye piss yerself?”
Bella’s jaw dropped and Jax died of laughter.
“Let me guess… Ye saw that snake and ye done pissed yerself!” Chibs teased as the lynx was still gnawing on it.
“Don’t be an ass…” Bella uttered.
“Ye smell like a urinal.”
“Thanks…” She grumbled.
Bella cleared her throat.
“Would you mind driving me to the pond?”
Chibs lifted his head on this. Bella looked towards her pants and sighed. She told him what really happened and Chibs chuckled.
“Ye must’ve had some quick reflexes.”
“Yeah I can drive you and Jackie Boy there, might as well while I’m here. Gotcha some more clothes too. Ye can send the others back with me and we’ll make certain they get washed.”
Bella came to her feet and to her great surprise, the lynx rubbed up against her. She looked to Chibs and he gave a simple nod as if telling her to give it another whirl. She crouched down and the lynx let her pet him this time.
“That’s so cool.” She whispered in awe and Chibs smiled.
Jax went on to unload the supplies from the van and was taking them into the church.
“Took care of him after I found him and his ma on the side of the road. She’d been hit and he was sittin’ there, tryin’ his hardest ta get her ta come to. He was just a wee thing then. Brought him here… That’s how I discovered the church. I didn’t wanna run the risk of him endin’ up with the same fate as his ma. So drove out quite a ways, in order to assure that. He’s made a home here ever since.”
Chibs looked to be in thought as he watched Bella pet the lynx.
“I’d come here every now and then…” He looked to the church then back to Bella.
“When Clay and I were lockin’ horns. This church was my serenity so to speak. Bob would greet me everytime. It’s like he knew the sound of my bike.”
There was this certain sadness in his eyes and Bella got the feeling that he wanted that to stay between them. She hadn’t expected that from Chibs. But for whatever reason, that only earned more of her respect. It was nice… seeing this softer side of him.
Jax grabbed another load then headed back inside.
“How ye holdin’ up?” Chibs whispered.
“And Jackie Boy?”
“Gave me a bit of a scare that first week. But we’re good now.”
Bella told him about Jax’s infection and how his fever spiked. She even told him about the dream he’d had and how he attacked her. She wasn’t sure why she even told Chibs that. But part of her felt like she needed to get it off her chest. She hadn’t talked about that day since it happened. She didn’t want to put that guilt on Jax but it scared the shit out of her, attacking her like that. Chibs narrowed his eyes on this.
“Jaysus…” He whispered.
“But he’s okay now?”
“Yeah.” She said but looked to be on the verge of tears.
Chibs took notice and was quick to hug her.
“Aye now. None of that, lass.” He whispered, before pecking her on the cheek.
“I didn’t have any antibiotics. I thought I was going to lose him, he was so sick.”
Chibs cringed on this.
“Well ye got some now. Plenty, if somethin’ else goes down. Sorry aboot that darlin’.”
“How is everyone?” She asked and Chibs dropped his hold.
“I’ll discuss that on the way. I’m sure Jackie wants ta know as well.”
Bella nodded and Chibs wrapped his arm around her shoulder.
Jax was going through the supplies and emptying the other cooler when they entered the church. He lifted his eyes and drew back a breath. He could see it all over the Scot’s face. This wasn’t just some crush. No. Chibs was in love with his old lady. Part of him sympathized but there was this whole other side… One that wanted to beat him off his old lady. Bella hadn’t a clue. Everytime Chibs stole a kiss or a hug it wasn’t like that of other women. There was something much more intimate about it. Jax knew that was the real reason behind Chibs being so damn defensive when it came to her. Sure, he believed in “Wraith’s” cause, that there was no lie. But Chibs couldn’t stand it when anyone harped on the girl, even that of Jax. Jax wasn’t used to being on the jealous side of things. He’d been with women that were plenty jealous, Tara and Wendy were fine examples of that. Bella most certainly had her moments as well but nothing like that of those two. Bella’s jealousy was a little more on the healthy side. Wouldn’t feel right, being with a woman that didn’t get jealous from time to time. That would make any man feel more inclined to run around, thinking the woman he was with didn’t give a damn. Wrong as it was, that’s just how Jax felt. He happened to appreciate a little jealousy. That in itself was human nature.
Only Jax wasn’t used this feeling, much less towards another brother. He’d never been in a situation where a Son showed interest in one of his old lady’s. But when he thought back on it, he realized why… They saw Tara and Wendy for the train wrecks they were. Whereas, trouble seemed to follow Bella around, Tara and Wendy were nothing BUT trouble themselves. No man wanted that. And even though Wendy and Tara were beautiful, in their own ways, even Jax knew they didn’t come anywhere close to Bella in comparison. This girl was covered in scars and still, she could put the women of Charming to shame. Her personality only added to that smoking body of hers. She truly was one of the rare ones and Jax knew no matter how long he searched, there’d never be another like her. And that was his fear when it came to Chibs. He wasn’t an idiot. He knew the Scot felt the same, as to that wounded look of his. Jax and Chibs shared those feelings when it came to Bella. The more he thought on it… The more he wondered if Chibs doing their wedding was such a good idea after all. Jax himself would hate being in that situation. Doing the ceremony of the girl you want for yourself?! How fucked up can you get?! Jax couldn’t do it! Not a chance in hell. It’d rip his heart out and he was sure Chibs would feel the same. But Jax’s greatest fear? Was Bella discovering those feelings for herself. What would she do if she knew the truth behind Chibs Telford? Jax tried ignoring those feelings, many times. Still, they’d creep up on him and he wasn’t one that was used to feeling insecure. But Jax saw this for what it really was… He’d hurt his girl, more than a handful of times. All it would take is a drunken night of Bella remembering all the shit Jax had pulled and Chibs admitting the truth behind his feelings.
Jax blinked a couple times. She had her hand along his arm and was looking to him with concern.
“Are you alright?” She whispered.
Jax cleared his throat before answering. This wasn’t like him at all. What was wrong with him?! Chibs was his fucking brother, and like Op, he might as well be blood. And this was the girl of his dreams. Of course they wouldn’t do anything to hurt him. Chibs was loyal as fuck, no matter the situation. He’d never hurt a brother, knowing that only made Jax angry with himself. As for Bella? She was one of the most faithful and loving women he knew. She had every chance to get him back and didn’t. She could’ve slept with anyone she wanted, just to shove it in his fucking face, but didn’t. No. Here she was, with his goddamn ring on her finger. And Jax knew that in another forty to fifty years, she’d by his side. They wouldn’t end up as another statistic. No. He wanted to be the first in his family. He wanted this to work and he knew the only way of going about that was to fight for his old lady, just as much as he does for his club. That’s what marriage is, a constant battle. You don’t give up once you say your vows. That was the mistake he made with Wendy. He wouldn’t make that mistake again. No. Bella was worth fighting for. If anything… He looked to Chibs in thought. The Scot would be a constant reminder of what could’ve been. If Bella hadn’t forgiven him, she could’ve ended up with Chibs instead. Having Op and Piney as family that would’ve kept the Sons in close range, even if she never gave Jax another chance.
Chibs wouldn’t have wasted that opportunity, not after knowing the truth behind what Jax had done.
And if Jax gave him hell over it, Chibs would’ve shoved Jax’s wronging’s right in his face. It would’ve been no more than he deserved. That was one of the things Jax admired most about Chibs, his loyalty. Not just to the club, but to Fiona as well, before he learned the truth about Jimmy. Then he stopped giving a damn and dived into whatever pussy he wanted. If anything… Chibs wasn’t something to feel threatened by. No. He was someone to be inspired by. That’s what Jax wanted for his future. He wanted to be someone everyone could trust. Someone they looked up to, especially Abel.
“Just fine, darlin’.” He uttered and smiled as he kissed her.
Chibs was helping in getting them settled in, when Jax placed a hand along his shoulder. Chibs cranked his head back and Jax gave a simple nod.
“Giving me something to look forward to.”
Chibs raised his brows looking downright lost and Jax chuckled.
“You’re alright old man. I can only hope to be half of what you are one day.”
“What’s come over ye Jackie boy? Are ye high?”
“Man do I wish…” Jax murmured as he exited the church again.
Chibs and Bella looked to one another in question and shrugged. Bella was going through the bag Chibs had set aside for her and putting everything in her backpack, when she came to a complete halt. Chibs took notice as he was shifting the ice around in the cooler. The poor girl turned ghostly white and her hands were shaking.
“Hey…” Chibs softly called but she didn’t seem to hear him.
Oh shit… He thought as he saw what Bella was looking at. THREE unopened boxes of tampons. One of those boxes was from when Opie and Piney first packed for them, the other was what Happy had left behind, and that last box was what Chibs had packed. There were unopened pads as well. He too was doing the math and panicking on her behalf. That was the last thing she and Jax needed. What a time to get knocked up! While they’re in hiding and playing dead? Jax had reentered the church with the water and Bella was quick to zip up that backpack. She shoved it away from her, like it was a bomb ready to go off. Bella looked to no one as she exited the church. Chibs wanted to reach out to her but wasn’t sure how. It was more than obvious she didn’t want to talk about it, much less wanted anyone to know. The Scot kept in mind to send a pregnancy test with whoever came out next. He only hoped it would be someone like Happy or Tig. She didn’t need her uncle or gramps handling that one. This had him thinking about everything she would need, if she was indeed pregnant. She would need folic acid and actual meals. She and Jax were showing signs of weight loss as it were. That wouldn’t be good for Bella if she was with child. He thought about the Irish and the Russians and what all was to come. They could only hide out for so long. They had Abel and Gemma to get back to.
“You ready to head out?” Jax called.
“Aye, whenever ye are.”
Jax nodded and they headed on out.
“Where’d Bella run off to?” Jax questioned as they were looking around.
“I’m here…” She called as she was behind the van.
They made their way over and Jax reared back.
“What’s wrong baby?” He asked as they could tell she’d been crying.
“Bella, your eyes… are you feeling okay?” He probed.
“I’m fine, really.”
“Bella…” Jax pressed knowing something was up.
“Just eager to get cleaned up, that’s all.” She sounded so sad; this had both men looking to one another.
Chibs didn’t comment and hopped into the van. Jax opened the back doors and gestured for Bella to go first. Once he was seated, he pulled her into his lap and Bella went to lift back up. Jax got a tighter hold and wouldn’t let her.
“I’m covered in urine…” She reminded.
“Don’t bother me any.” He murmured with a shrug.
“Now you wanna tell me what’s goin’ on?”
“Jackson… I said I was fine.”
Come on lass, just spill it out. Knowing Jackie he’ll be over the moon. The Scot thought as he peered into the rearview mirror. He couldn’t get over just how destroyed she looked. He wanted her to say something, just so she wouldn’t feel so alone. If Jax knew there was a possibility of her being with child… He’d do everything within his power to keep the two of them safe. What Tara pulled… with that abortion. Damn near killed him. Chibs hadn’t any doubt; Bella wouldn’t pull something like that. It just wasn’t in her. Still, she needed to tell him. But the more the Scot thought on it… The more he realized that he himself needed to know. It was driving him mad. Chibs pulled up to the pond and let the two of them out.
“I got somethin’ ta take care of. Why don’t ye go on and do whatcha need ta do. I’ll be back in aboot an hour or so.”
Jax looked to Chibs in question but didn’t comment. They grabbed whatever they needed and Chibs went about his way.
Chibs headed for the nearest town and parked at the first pharmacy he saw. It felt strange… walking through and eyeing at all these pregnancy tests. Even stranger considering this was for Jax’s old lady. Chibs let out a miserable laugh as he grabbed one and went on to get whatever else she might need, just in case. He’d much rather be safe than sorry. And if she wasn’t pregnant then she could save them for later on. He grabbed a few other things, reckoning Bella and Jax could use them. Once he finished, he headed to a nearby pizza parlor, figuring they’d appreciate a nice warm meal for once.
Jax had his arms wrapped around Bella’s waist, as they were in the pond and shivering. Both were in their underwear, on the off chance that Chibs returned, before he said he would. Still that didn’t seem to help Bella, in the slightest. Her bra was white, very see-through, and her nipples were nice and erect. Jax would’ve been rocking one hell of a hard on if the water wasn’t so fucking cold. They’d grown used to this. The pond had its good and bad days. Today was a little warmer than most, as the sun was beating right down on them. Still, they couldn’t stay long. They’d run the risk of hypothermia. Like usual, Jax helped as Bella scrubbed down. He wiggled his brows as he pulled her panties aside and got her nice and clean below. He narrowed his eyes however as she had no real reaction. Usually, she would laugh or tease him in return. But she had this numb air about her. Bella rinsed her hair then handed Jax the shampoo. That was another thing… She usually washed his hair for him. They had their little things they did for one another, in attempts to speed up the bathing process. But she barely looked at him and rushed out, first chance she got. Jax himself was in a hurry and figured she was just too cold today. The young woman grabbed her towel and went on to warm up in the sun. Jax headed on out and dried off as well. Bella sat their typical spot and stared into space. Jax sat beside her and like usual, wrapped his arm around her. Still, she didn’t react. Normally, she’d lean against him and wrap herself around him for warmth.
“Did I do something wrong?” Jax questioned feeling rather stupid, considering he knew he hadn’t.
Still, she sure acted as if he had. Things hadn’t been this awkward in a very long time. He didn’t get it. What happened?! Bella snapped out of whatever it was and glanced his direction.
“Why would you think that?”
“Because you’re acting like I did.”
Bella flinched on this.
“Jackson, you didn’t do anything.” She said but brokenheartedly.
“Then tell me what’s going on. You’ve been acting strange, ever since Chibs arrived. Did he say something to you?!”
“It hasn’t anything to do with Chibs.”
“Then what is it baby? We had an agreement, remember? We don’t keep shit from one another. So if something’s up, I need to know.”
Bella closed her eyes “I’m late”, she whispered.
“Late?” He asked rather lost at first.
“You mean as in…” He hinted with widened eyes.
“How late we talkin’?”
“Few weeks or so… I haven’t had one since we’ve been here. I didn’t think about it until Chibs brought that stuff by. He brought me more tampons and I hadn’t even used the last two boxes. Now there’s three…”
“Are you saying I knocked you up in that confession booth?!” He said but like a kid come Christmas morning.
“It must’ve been… I was on the pill, until everything went south. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry, Jackson.” She uttered looking absolutely broken.
Jax however had this shit eating grin about him.
“Hell, I wish you would’ve said something earlier! We could’ve had Chibs get you a test!”
“Jackson…” She groaned.
“I can’t believe you might be pregnant. That’s awesome!”
Bella’s couldn’t believe what she was hearing.
“Well yeah… We were going to have one anyway.” He said with a shrug.
“Yeah but NOW?! We’ve got a mess to clean up back home. We had to send Abel away with your mother! Bringing another child…” She trailed off and went on this rant about why they couldn’t have a baby. How it wasn’t the right time and how they weren’t even married yet. Not that she was thinking along the lines of what Tara had, not even close. But she was angry with herself. How could they be so cruel?! Bringing a baby into this?! These thoughts set her off and Jax looked over, seeing as how she was in full-blown panic. He cringed as he thought back to the pills at the church.
“Hey…” he softly called.
Bella gasped back and struggled to catch her breath. This made a first since they went into hiding. She hadn’t even come close to an attack. If anything, she had been more at peace. Now she was back to that girl in Charming – the one that had too much on her plate. Jax raised her arms above her head and laid her down.
“Shhhh…” he whispered as he went on to calm her down.
“Breathe sweetness… Breathe with me…”
Bella nodded and focused on breathing, right along with Jax.
“That’s my girl.” He whispered and put his forehead to hers.
“We don’t know if you are or aren’t. But if you are… We’ll make it work, we always do. I won’t let anything happen to you or our baby, understood?”
Bella closed her eyes and tears streamed on down her face. Jax wiped them away and smiled.
“I feel like if it’s meant to be then so be it. We’ve taken on so much. This is nothing. We got this Bella baby, alright?”
Bella nodded once again but was taken back by how happy Jax was.
“Just the thought… Damn. I wasn’t kidding the day I mentioned you with a big round belly. Just the mere idea… Fuck…” Jax growled that last part and was loving all over her.
“All I can think about is fucking you and making certain I got the job done. I know that’s crazy. But that’s how badly I want this. I’m sorry, Bella. I can’t control that urge. It’s damn near animalistic. I want you to have my baby.”
Jax heatedly kissed her but sighed when heard the van pulling up.
“Cockblocker.” He murmured, while Bella had this ‘look’. A look that was crossed somewhere between horrified, yet in awe.
Chibs hopped on out of the van with pizza and beer. Jax chuckled as he sat the boxes and beer down. Chibs hadn’t a clue how to go about handing Bella that test. Not without downright offending her. But before he could even think on how to go about it… the bag fell out of his leather jacket. Jax was first to pick it up. The moment he saw the contents, he shot Chibs a look of complete and utter hell.
“What in the fuck…” Jax uttered and looked to his old lady then back to Chibs.
“Jackson?” Bella questioned and he gritted his teeth.
“You can’t be serious!” Jax snapped, at the both of them.
Chibs looked to the test then back to Jax.
“Jackie boy…” He said thinking Jax had the wrong idea.
And that he did, just not in the way the Scot was thinking.
“Jaysus kid… Is that what you really think?!” Chibs went on to say and Jax curled his lip at this.
“I KNOW THAT SHIT, YOU FUCKING PRICK! I’M TALKING ABOUT MY OLD LADY TELLIN’ YOU, BEFORE ME! I HAD TO DRILL IT OUT OF HER BUT SHE JUST FLAT OUT TOLD YOU?! THAT’S FUCKED UP! THAT’S MYYY KID SHE’S KNOCKED UP WITH, YET SHE GOES AND TELLS YOU FIRST?! ALWAYS THE HERO, RIGHT FILIP?! YOU JUST HAD TO SKIP OFF AND GET HER A MOTHERFUCKING PREGNANCY TEST AND WHAT IN THE FUCK ARE THESE?!” Jax picked up a bottle and rolled his eyes.
“PRENATAL VITAMINS?! AND WHAT’S ALL THIS OTHER SHIT?! WE DON’T EVEN KNOW IF SHE’S PREGNANT YET, YOU FUCKING DIPSHIT!” Jax spat as he dug through the bag.
“Jackson…” Bella whispered in disbelief.
She sent Chibs an apologetic glance. But she herself was somewhat confused by Chibs’s impulse buy, as well as Jax’s sudden accusation.
“I can’t believe you told him before me…” Jax murmured looking undeniably shattered.
“Aye now, Jackie… The little lass didn’t tell me a thing. It was just a mere assumption.”
“Assumption?” She and Jax chorused.
“Aye… I saw the way she was lookin’ at those tampons and put two and two tagether. I meant nothin’ by it. I was only tryin’ ta help. So dontcha go and yell at her over somethin’ I did. She didn’t tell me anythin’.”
Jax pinched his eyes shut and with this defeated presence about him.
“Once again, you discover something about my girl, before I even catch on…” He muttered under his breath.
“Fuck…” Jax came to his feet and strolled off on his own.
“Shite… I’m sorry lass. I didn’t think he’d take it like that.”
Bella however was looking to the test, like it was that rattlesnake.
“What if I am…” She whispered amongst herself.
Chibs lifted his eyes on this. He wanted to reassure her that everything would be okay, but knew it wasn’t his place. He needed to find Jax and fix things with him. He never meant to come off as trying to show him up. And he could see how it might’ve looked that way. Another man buying a pregnancy test and for your old lady? He didn’t think about how that would look. Chibs left Bella to her thoughts and went on to find Jax.
“Jackie…” Chibs called and Jax shook his head as he was leaning against a tree, having a smoke.
“You gonna be in the delivery room too?!”
Chibs reared back on this.
“What’s come over ya?!”
“Come on, Chibs… Don’t you think you pay a little TOO much attention to my old lady?!”
Chibs drew back a hesitant breath on this. He wasn’t sure how to answer that one.
“I meant nothing by it, kid.”
“I know and I get that. But would you mind backing off, just a bit?!”
“No man… You manage to one up me, every fucking time. And I keep telling myself it’s okay, but not this time. Don’t you take this away from me.”
“And what is it I’m taking away from you?”
“I’m not my father and you’re not Clay…” He darkly uttered and Chibs felt as if Jax had literally taken a knife to his heart. He never dreamed of hearing those words, not from Jackson Teller. This had Chibs looking to his old president in disbelief.
“Ye didn’t just say that shite, not ta me! And why would ye even imply that when ye just said what ye said earlier. You know there isn’t shite between me and Bella!”
“Not yet… But if you keep on going on this. She’s sure to see me for the piece of shit I really am and you’ll be certain to come running when I do, won’t you?!”
“She’s already seen ya for the piece of shite ye are, remember?! That girl’s gone above and beyond, in order ta make things work with ye. What more does she hafta do in order ta prove she isn’t goin’ anywhere?! She loves you, Jackie, not me, not anyone else. You. Nothin’ aboot that’s goin’ ta change. So whatever this is, ye need ta comes inta terms with it and before ye make the mistake of her over hearin’ ye. Now I can admit that what did wasn’t right. I wasn’t thinkin’…”
“You never answered my question.”
“And what is it ye want me ta say Jackie?”
“Ye already know the truth. I thought we hand an understandin’. I’m not aboot ta do anythin’, ye should know me better than that.”
“And what if she wants you to?”
Chibs closed his eyes on this.
“Jackie, I need you to think kid. Yer not only questionin’ my loyalty but the old lady’s. If that’s how ye really feel then maybe the problem isn’t me.”
Jax let out a low growl and Chibs sighed.
“Listen ta yerself. Ye just asked me what I would do if Bella came onta me… Ye just showed that ye don’t even trust the woman yer aboot ta marry.”
Jax froze as if the thought hadn’t even occurred to him.
“Ye don’t trust either one of us. Ye just made that clear.”
This had both men cringing. Chibs and Jax locked eyes for a brief moment.
“Nothin’ ye need ta worry about lass. Trager and I fucked up on somethin’ and Jackie boy was puttin’ us in our place.”
Jax swallowed back on this and Chibs gave a simple nod.
“I better head on back. I got some shite ta take care of. Hop into the van and I’ll give ye both a lift back ta the church.”
Bella said nothing as she handed Jax the pregnancy test. He narrowed his eyes and looked to it. He smiled but that smile was soon to fade…
“I won’t pay for your sins, or the insecurities brought on by no one other than yourself. I think the world of Chibs but I love you. Don’t question my faithfulness, Jackson. When I give someone my all, that’s just what I do. It doesn’t matter if you wronged me or not. I knew what I was getting into and the possibilities. But I trusted that you wouldn’t be that ignorant again. I’ll give as much as you give and I’ll take as much as you take. Just keep that in mind, before you go on another rant about something that hasn’t happened and never will.”
Bella looked to Chibs afterward.
“That’s some kind of brotherly love, covering his ass like that. I’m not sure if I should admire that or be pissed. Either way… don’t ever lie to me again.”
Both men just stood there, in a daze as she walked away.
Bella didn’t say a word the entire drive back. Chibs however went on to tell them how the others were, including that of the Phantoms. He made no mention of their arrest and how Opie had bailed them out. He figured Bella was under enough stress. That and she looked rightfully pissed. Who wouldn’t be? Jax pretty much admitted that he didn’t trust her. The Scot doubted that’s how he really felt but it was clear that he was going through something. Part of that was Chibs’s own doing and he knew that. All he could do was make it up to him, somehow. Chibs regarded the both of them through the rearview mirror. They wouldn’t even look at one another. Chibs could only imagine just how long these next few weeks would be. Nothing like being stuck with the one person that’s pissed with you. But he knew they’d work it out, they always did.
Just as soon as they pulled up to the church, Bella hopped out. Jax said nothing on it and gathered whatever they’d brought. Chibs grabbed the pizza and beer and brought them inside as well. He had planned on eating with them but figured that wasn’t such a great idea now. If anything, he needed to get out of their hair. Things were pretty tense. This made a first where Jax and Chibs didn’t hug or say their goodbyes. Chibs knew it would be best if he left him alone. So he hit the road and didn’t turn back.
Bella and Jax devoured the pizza in silence. When Bella finished, she went and lay down in one of the pews. It wasn’t long before she was sound asleep. Jax sighed amongst himself and grabbed the duffle bag. He hadn’t looked through it yet and wondered why it was so heavy. Jax nodded once he saw that it was filled with books, his and Bella’s. Jax saw The Outsiders, Lord of the Flies, The Catcher in the Rye, and his Lonesome Dove series. Beneath that were Bella’s books such as Gone with the Wind, A few Jane Austen books, Shakespeare, Atonement, and Count of Monte Cristo. Jax laughed at that last one, considering the argument he and Chibs just had. He shrugged and decided on reading that one. He couldn’t remember the last time he sat down and actually read.
He only made it through a few pages however. He kept lifting those eyes of his and glancing Bella’s direction. All he could think about was that pregnancy test and even with the whole situation being stressful as fuck, he managed to smile, all over again. Jax wondered what Abel would think… having a little brother or sister. He couldn’t wait to tell him and Gemma. He knew his mother would be over the moon. This had Jax leaning back and gawking at Bella while she slept. He kept picturing his old lady with that belly. He couldn’t explain it, not even to himself. But this was so different from when Wendy first revealed the news. He knew that was her way of forcing him to stay in her life, somehow. And knowing she was still shooting up even after that, made him loathe the very air she breathed. He stayed civil for Abel’s sake but that was it. He’d never forgive Wendy for nearly killing HIS son. But things were different now. It was crazy wanting to have a baby. Since when did Jackson Teller want something like that?! But that’s how this girl affected him. He wanted it all. That’s how cemented Bella’s love was. Sure she’d get pissed with him, like she was now. But he knew what they had was forever, which had him thinking back to what she’d overheard… Jax recoiled. He hadn’t meant it the way it sounded. He knew Bella wouldn’t hurt him like that. But it was how Chibs went about that. It drove him mad. So he had a moment of weakness and was questioning everything. But he hadn’t meant a word of it. If anyone had accused his old lady of cheating, he’d cut their fucking heart out. That seemed somewhat hypocritical considering he had ripped hers out. The look on her face… it was enough to crush him.
Jax grabbed the bag Chibs had set aside for her and lined everything up. There were prenatal vitamins, something for morning sickness, breath mints, cocoa butter, saltine crackers, pickles, 7up, antacids, and he even got her a book on what to expect when expecting. This had Jax shaking his head in thought. Those were things HE should’ve gotten for her. But deep down, Jax knew he wouldn’t have thought about half those things. That alone had him feeling even more like a dick. He hadn’t done those things for Wendy either but now that he looked back on it, he wished he had. Not so much for Wendy’s sake but for Abel’s. He planned on making up for the sins of his past. And he’d start by giving his old lady his all. He’d be there every step of the way, he wouldn’t miss a thing.
“How they holdin’ up?” Opie questioned once Chibs entered the garage.
This had the Sons looking to Chibs in question.
“Ye try bein’ stuck in a goddamn church fur for six weeks, with nothin’ ta do.” He added with a shrug and got straight to work.
He wasn’t about to tell anyone about the pregnancy. It wasn’t his place to. No. That needed to be Jax and Bella’s doing. He’d done enough damage as it was. In fact, Jax had a point, it was time he backed off a bit. He hadn’t realized just how bad he was, not until Jax pointed it out. He made it a habit… reading Bella. But she wasn’t his to read. He knew it’d take some getting used to. But he had no choice but to pay more attention to what he was doing, when she was around. He hated the idea, but knew he’d feel the same way if the tables were turned.
“You sure everything’s okay?” Opie asked and Chibs lifted his eyes as he as reading something on one of the clipboards.
“You seem distracted.”
“Just a long drive…”
“Why don’t you take the rest of the day off?”
“Nah, just it’s couple more hours till closin’ anyhow.”
“Exactly. Might as well go on home. Besides, we got a long couple days ahead of us…” Opie hinted as to their plans for Stahl.
Chibs nodded and looked to be in thought.
“Did you tell them?” The president questioned.
“Figured if that should wait until they’re back.”
“You’re probably right.”
Opie took the clipboard from Chibs’s hold.
“Go home, brother.”
Chibs gave a reluctant sigh but did as his president ordered.
Jax hadn’t realized he’d fallen asleep, not until he heard Bella digging through the bag Chibs had gotten her. He opened his eyes and Bella was sitting in the pew, looking to each of the items. She held up the cocoa butter, with this confused look and shrugged amongst herself. She flipped through the book and set it aside. Then she picked up the bottle of prenatal vitamins and was reading the label. Jax smiled as she popped one into her mouth. Wendy never took that shit. Then again, she was more concerned about her next fix than that of Abel. Bella lifted her shirt at one point and was looking to her belly. Jax chuckled amongst himself as she poked at it a couple times. She had her innocent moments and it damn near killed him. Bella hadn’t a clue when it came to being with child. But he’d walk her through this, the best he could.
Bella put everything back into the bag. She came to her feet and still, she had that defeated look about her. He wished he could ease her fears a bit. He knew this wasn’t so much about being pregnant as much as it was about what was to come. He could see it written all over her face. She was afraid of losing the baby. She put her hair up into a ponytail and headed outside. Jax came to a stand and lit up a smoke as he followed.
“Thought you were asleep…” He heard her say as she was petting Bob.
Jax didn’t comment and kicked back beside one of the trees. He hadn’t a clue what to say or do. He knew he fucked up. But it was one of those moments where he wasn’t so sure he knew how to fix it. Actions spoke louder than words and that’s just what he’d keep on doing. But he knew he had to say something. So he said the most generic thing he could come up with.
Bella lifted her eyes and Jax nodded.
“I know it doesn’t matter what I say. I fucked up, again. And I’ll keep fucking up. That’s pretty obvious. But I’m more than willing to make up for all my fuckups, present and all.”
“And how will you do that?” She questioned but with a playful smirk.
“I suppose I’ll figure that out as I go.”
“You really are a mess, Jackson.”
“Tell me something I don’t know.”
“The baby is actually Dizzy’s.” She witted and Jax cocked a brow on this.
“Why am I NOT surprised?”
“You know… at first I thought you were going to accuse me of cheating on you. The way you reacted to that test… I was just waiting for you to say something along those lines.” She said but with this hurtful expression.
“Not even. That was more on Chibs than you darlin’.”
Bella had that puzzled look again and Jax sighed.
“Come on, sweetness. You can’t tell me you haven’t noticed by now.”
“Chibs… and how he is with you. I wouldn’t have said what I said if it were just my imagination. That shit’s real.”
“You really think Chibs is in love with me?”
“I don’t think. I know. He’s felt that way for awhile too.”
“Jackson…” She started to defend but something in his eyes had her refraining.
“Chibs himself has pretty much admitted this and to my face.”
Bella couldn’t believe what she was hearing.
“Chibs Telford?!” Sure, she’d heard what was said still, she found that hard to believe.
“I just get tired of having it shoved in my face, that’s all. I lost my cool. This is something that’s been building. I needed to put him in his place, but I never meant to hurt you in the process.”
“You really think I’d come onto Chibs?”
“I don’t know why I even said that shit. Like I said… I was pissed off but not at you. You didn’t do anything wrong. As to your question… No I don’t. If you were going to pull something like that, you’d have done it by now. I’ve given you plenty reason. Hell, you could’ve easily tricked me, by taking me back, just long enough to rip my heart out, the way I did yours. It would’ve been no more than I deserved. I couldn’t have said shit about it. Just accepted it for what it was. For some reason, the thought never occurred to me until now. Pretty stupid, huh?!”
“I think that would’ve hurt me more than you.”
This had Jax looking to her in wonder.
“I don’t have it in me to be that vindictive. Jackson, you don’t seem to get why it hurt so bad. You were it. I knew that from the beginning. So it killed me when I realized you weren’t thinking along the same lines.” Jax went to argue this and Bella shut him up with a single finger.
“I know you say differently. But honestly, Jackson… If you were on the same page, you would’ve told me the truth about Tara, and we would’ve found a way to make it work. But you were too busy juggling both lives and seeing which one was more suitable to your liking. While you were juggling, I already knew what I wanted. That’s why it hurt. It took a bit but we’re on the same page now. I only wish it wouldn’t have gone the way it did. Could’ve saved us both some heartache. But everything happens for a reason. Perhaps, that was scare was something you needed. Better to get that out of the way, before we walk down that aisle and bring this child into our lives.”
“You have got to be kidding…” Opie murmured as they were in a meeting and Tig handed over the information their president had requested.
This was something they’d hoped to get out of the way a few weeks back. But it had been one thing after another and the Sons were far too busy with the club and the shop itself. They hadn’t realized just how much weight Jax and Juice pulled until they weren’t around. The Sons were pulling extra hours and had been dealing with Jimmy off and on, since he’d come to town. Something Chibs wasn’t too pleased about. Jimmy went out his way to give the Scot a little hell. And he loved shoving the whole I stole your wife and daughter bit in his face. Jimmy had come to check in with the boys and make certain everything was on the up and up with the cartel. The Sons knew that meant that Galen and the others would be showing up soon. They’d jump right into business, like Jax’s death was nothing. Opie only hoped they didn’t expect anything up front. They didn’t have it. It took everything they had arranging those two funerals. Surely, they wouldn’t expect a dime, not until the Sons managed to get their own business taken care of.
“It’s all there. Took pictures of everything.”
“And you’re certain you put everything right back where it was…”
“Scouts honor.” Tig smarted and Chibs let out a laugh of utter mockery.
“Scout my arse.”
The others laughed as well and Tig sighed.
“I could’ve been…” he mumbled with a frown.
Opie went over everything in silence and was shaking his head off and on.
“Just imagine if she had gotten away with this and if Tara had gone through with that deal.” The president muttered and this had Piney tilting his head in question.
“Right?” Tig replied.
“What are you talking about?” Piney asked and Opie slid Tig’s cellphone over.
Piney went through the pictures and put on his glasses, so he could see better.
“They were going to pin Donna’s murder on Bella?!”
“From the looks of things…” Opie uttered with a sneer.
“On top of setting her up as a rat.”
“Whatever they could think of… Tara really had it out for her. She wanted Bella completely isolated and locked away.”
“And just what did she think that would achieve? Did she honestly think he’d come crawling back to her, once my granddaughter was doing life?!”
“Jax cheats on her and yet she goes out her way to make the woman he was caught with pay, all in hopes of getting him back?! Can way say fuck-ing-in-sane?! I always knew she was a little ‘off’, even in high school she had her moments. But this truly takes the cake. She does all this AND aborts his fucking baby?!”
This had the Sons looking to Opie in shock. They hadn’t known that part.
“She what?” Chibs spat and Opie nodded.
“That’s right. The doc found out she was pregnant and went and had the baby off’ed like it was a fucking stray dog.”
“I thought Wendy was nuts. But Tara… She’s truly lost it.”
“Wonder what the ole deputy thinks about all this.”
Tig and Opie recoiled on this and Piney reared back.
“Take a better look at those…” Tig said with a sigh and Happy went on to show Piney how to zoom in.
“Since when does the golden boy play dirty?!” Piney thundered and Opie rolled his eyes.
“Anything for Tara.”
“I can’t believe he signed off on that shit!”
“Oh yeah, he’s a witness to these “confessions” of Bella’s.” Opie scoffed.
“And just how did they think they’d get away with that, without her actual confession?” Piney asked.
“Blackmail.” Tig stated and this had the Winstons looking to him in question.
Tig gestured for them to give his phone back. Then he scrolled on through the evidence.
“Fuck…” Opie murmured as Tig showed him what they had on Bella.
“That wasn’t Bella. That was me!”
Tig raised his brows and Opie sighed. He went on to tell the Sons about his niece and the wannabe vampire cult. But Stahl had managed to set Bella up with that as well. In fact, that was going to be her selling point. Why wouldn’t she kill her aunt? She’s taken lives before, why not again?! Stahl would’ve had Bella pegged as a ruthless murderer. There would be no sympathy, from any jury, considering the rap sheet Stahl had come up with. Along with what Bella was in the first place – a street racer, leader at that, engaged to another criminal, the president of SAMCRO, nevertheless. Stahl and Tara had everything mapped out, just perfectly. But the sheriff’s name was nowhere to be found. No. It was all David, which meant Wayne hadn’t a clue these even exited.
“Guess we need to have a little talk with David as well.”
“A fed and a dep?! It must be Christmas!” Tig smarted and the Sons laughed.
Opie’s cellphone rang at this point and he held up a finger as he answered.
“Not sure how much longer I can keep this up.”
“Yeah… She spotted me today.”
“And how’d you handle that?”
“Did what you told me. Made it sound like we were concerned about her wellbeing and just keeping an eye on her.”
“And how’d she react?”
“Iffy… Honestly? I’m surprised she hadn’t caught on sooner.”
He said as Opie had made it Juice’s personal mission to keep an eye on Tara. He’d been at this since the funeral and had several close calls.
“Tell you what… Why don’t you knock on the door and hand the phone over.”
The Sons overheard this and was looking to Op, like he’d lost his mind. They heard Juice knocking on Tara’s door and it wasn’t long before he handed the phone over.
“Who is this?!” She barked and Opie rolled his eyes.
“Hey, I’m sorry about Juice. That was my call. I didn’t feel comfortable leaving you without some sort of protection. After losing Bella and Jax… I can’t take anymore chances.”
Piney looked as if he wanted to vomit and Tig shook his head but with a smirk.
“Chances?” They heard Tara question on the other end.
“Yeah. We’re keeping an eye on family, even if they’re not club affiliated anymore. It’s what Jax would’ve wanted. He’ll be out of your hair in a few more weeks.”
“No. It’s okay, really. I understand.”
“Yeah. Thanks for looking after me Op.” That had Opie curling his lip.
Since when did SHE call him Op?! Opie drew back a breath before replying.
“Anytime.” He said before hanging up.
“Well that was certainly a Jax moment, if I ever saw one.” Piney declared.
“Had to be done.” Opie uttered.
“I agree, just didn’t think you had it in you.”
“There are a lot of things you don’t know about me pops. Keep up and maybe you’ll learn something.”
“So the little lass gets accused, back when Clay was still kickin’. Rat and Kozik were told to keep quiet about Tara and played along.” Chibs uttered and looked to be in thought.
Opie lifted his eyes that direction and the two looked to be in silent conversation.
“What did Bella do…” Piney added and each of the Sons looked to him.
“Something had to set the agent off. Bella was her personal target and has been. Why? What did Bella do to get under that agent’s skin?”
None of them knew about Bella buying the jury out, back when Gemma was on trial. Stahl had Gemma, right where she wanted and Bella went and messed everything up. Stahl would’ve never dreamed on the jury siding with Gemma Morrow. But Bella had her ways and she took care of her future mother-in-law, just as she would any family. That’s where the personal vendetta started. It was because of that case alone that Stahl had to leave Charming and forgo the one she had against the Sons. She herself had to go on trial, against her own department, as her actions had raised some red flags. It took a bit, but she was able to prove her innocence, well stage her innocence.
Bella could’ve cost her everything. She wanted her out of the picture, but knew the only way she could achieve that was to set her up. Tara’s confession is what brought on the deal, as Tara made Stahl promise that Jax wouldn’t face any prison time. Everything was to be on Bella. But Stahl knew she had to ruffle everyone’s feathers a bit and the best way to do that was to make Clay believe that Bella had ratted the club out, as to her reason for searching the clubhouse. But Stahl never had any plans of taking the boys in. She knew they were far too smart to hide their weapons, or script, right on clubhouse grounds. So that deal she and Tara had made would still be intact. But this was sure to make Clay and the others question Bella’s involvement with the Sons. And it worked, like a charm. It wasn’t long before Clay came by, with a deal of his own.
By the time Stahl finished, she had Clay, Tara, Rat, Kozik, and the golden boy deputy playing the game. That game – putting Bella away for life and making certain she pushed everyone away in the process, including that of her uncle and gramps. Once a rat, always a rat. Stahl hadn’t any doubts that Opie Winston would hire someone to shank his own niece, by the time Stahl finished with her. Bella wouldn’t have a leg to stand on, much less anyone in her corner. Stahl couldn’t wait to see the look on Opie’s face when he found out his niece killed his wife, in cold blood. And considering Bella’s history, Stahl truly believed she had her right where she wanted. Bella had a history of drug abuse, a DUI, and there was a time where she was seeing a shrink. What’s to say Bella didn’t finally snap and let her aunt really have it? Perhaps her aunt said something to set her off, or maybe she wanted her uncle Op all to herself. What would stop her from going after the children next?!
These were just a few of the things in the notes Tig had found. Stahl had everything mapped out and would be the one buying the jury this time. Only it looked as if Tara and David had gotten cold feet. So that deal never came to light, making Stahl awfully bitter. She had no choice but to go about this alone, as to why she wasn’t able to gather all the evidence against Bella. She needed Tara and David, in order to do that. But David was afraid of his department finding out and he didn’t want to lose his job, much less set up an innocent woman. This of course had Tara’s blood boiling. That was the REAL reason behind Tara and David not working out. David might not have cared for Bella; in fact he couldn’t stand her, or her little street racer friends. But once he realized what he was about to do, he called it quits. He made it clear that he couldn’t take part in it. Bella hadn’t done anything deserving of being set up. Tara of course said otherwise and this caused a massive fight. A fight in which Tara dumped the deputy and that’s when she called Jax. She realized her mistake, too little too late.
Opie took his time looking everything over. He scribbled down a few notes of his own and the Sons waited in silence. He’d lean back every now and then look over what he had and go back to jotting down more.
“You gonna share with the rest of the class, boss?” Tig taunted and Opie lifted his head, like he were snapping out of something.
He lit a cigarette before answering.
“I brought her here, in hopes of giving her a second chance.”
Piney swallowed back as his son looked to be on the verge of a meltdown. Opie took a long drag then flicked his ashes into a nearby ashtray.
“My niece had her own demons to face, back in her hometown. She might be a lot of things, but this…” He pointed to the pictures on Tig’s cellphone.
“Isn’t her. That’s not to say she hasn’t taken any lives, we all have. There isn’t a brother here without blood on their hands.” He pointed to his own Men of Mayhem patch.
“But like Bella, we did what had to be done. But killing Donna… no. Hell no. All of this is on Stahl.”
Piney nodded in agreement.
“Bella thought of Donna like a mother. She’d die before hurting her family. That’s the only reason she has any blood on her hands. She’s a fighter and nothing’s keeping that girl down. Pops and I taught her everything she knows. She might’ve been the daughter of a pig. But that girl bleeds reaper and she’ll gather whatever souls she has to.”
Opie couldn’t believe his own words. But he was starting to see his niece in a whole new light. He was beginning to understand why she was the way she was.
Chibs smiled on this and Opie gave a simple nod.
“Hell, maybe we should patch her in!” Happy witted and the Sons laughed.
“Could you imagine? Clay would roll over in his grave!” Opie declared and the Sons laughed once again.
“He’d come back and haunt our sorry arses. I can’t believe ye let that bleeder in my club!”
“Yeah well… this isn’t his club anymore. I might be wearing the patch but this is Jackson’s club, always has been. We just had to wait and watch him grow. JT would be proud.”
“Amen brother.” Chibs uttered and the others nodded in agreement.
“All joking aside, she’d fit right in. But that’s not who she is. She might’ve been born a reaper but my niece is a free spirit. She likes things her way and the club would only weigh her down. Marrying into this is one thing but wearing the cut, is something else entirely. It just isn’t her. She’s Wraith, even when she turns that helmet in, she’ll always be Wraith. I can’t take that away from her and don’t plan to.”
Piney kept quiet but had never been prouder of his son. Its’ about time… He thought as to his son finally grasping what Piney had all along. Opie cleared his throat and looked to Tig and Chibs in thought.
“So here’s the plan…”
“You don’t have to stay out here you know.”
Juice looked over as he was kicked back on his bike. Tara had a couple cups of coffee and handed one over.
“Might as well come in. You can stay, until whatever this is clears.”
Tara didn’t comment and Juice reluctantly followed. He wasn’t so sure how Opie would feel about that. Tara pulled the door to behind him.
“Make yourself at home. Bathroom’s down the hall and there’s a guest bedroom, a couple doors down.”
Juice couldn’t believe the sheer amount of pictures she had, each of them were of her, Jax, and Abel. You would think they were living here. It creeped him out the more he saw. There wasn’t a single one of David.
“Are you hungry?” She asked and Juice shook his head no.
“Come on… Why don’t you shower and I’ll fix you a nice warm meal?”
“You don’t have to…” Juice trailed off however as Tara was humming amongst herself and already digging through the fridge.
He shrugged amongst himself and decided on taking her up on her offer. It was a free meal and he really could use a relaxing hot shower. It was freezing out there. That and he was getting a little tired of stalking the doc. It was awfully boring and he hadn’t been home in weeks now. He didn’t understand why Opie didn’t have the others taking turns. It was only fair, right?! Then again, Opie was new to this whole president thing and Juice was doing his best to be understanding. He knew they were dealing with a lot of shit back home. Juice took his time with that shower. But when he stepped out, he noticed the clothes he was wearing was gone. All that remained was his cut and a neatly stacked pile of ‘seemingly’ new clothes. It wasn’t until he unfolded them and had a better look that he realized they were Jax’s. There was a blue and white plaid shirt and white undershirt to go with it, along with Jax’s usual pants. Juice shook his head as he had no choice but to put them on, there was nothing else around. He stepped into the pants and sighed amongst himself. They were a little long on him, considering Jax was a good couple inches taller than him. Luckily, they were about the same size otherwise. Juice opened the medicine cabinet, in hopes of finding something for his migraine. He reared back however and glanced back towards the bathroom door. There were several prescription pills, each of them belonging to Tara Knowles. He wasn’t sure what the others were but he did pick up on the antipsychotics. This had him practically slamming that medicine cabinet shut and he took a few steps back.
“What the…,” he whispered amongst himself.
Juice put on his cut then stepped out of the bathroom. He narrowed his eyes as the lights were off and there was a soft, flickering glow coming from the dining room. He headed that way and thickly swallowed.
There was a candlelit dinner for two. Tara was sitting at the table, in a fancy nightgown, and sipping from a glass of wine. Juice let out a nervous laugh then rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.
“Am I interrupting something?” He questioned thinking that maybe the deputy was on his way over.
Tara didn’t comment and came to her feet. She walked on over and ran a hand along his cut.
“I really missed you.”
“Ummm, okay.” Juice awkwardly replied.
Tara took him by the hand and pulled out a chair for him.
“I made your favorite, Jax.”
“Juice…” The Son corrected and Tara didn’t react.
She had him scoot his chair in and went on to take a seat as well. There were a couple beers with his plate, Jax’s brand too. Juice had never felt so uncomfortable in his entire life. Since when did Tara have romantic feelings towards him?! And mistakenly calling him Jax?! Juice thought back to the meds she had in her cabinet and suddenly felt the urge to run.
“How’s your steak? Is it rare enough?” She asked while cutting into her own.
“Actually, I think I better head on out. Thank you.” Juice came to his feet and Tara pointed towards him, with the knife she was using, to cut her steak.
“But you just got here. Eat your steak, Jax. It’ll get cold.”
Juice shook his head in disbelief.
“Jax is dead, Tara. I’m Juice.”
Once again, she barely reacted. She sipped at her wine then stuffed another piece of steak into her mouth.
“I gotta go.” Juice came to his feet and grabbed his keys off the kitchen counter.
“But you just got here…” She repeated, as if off in her own world.
“Tara…?” He whispered with concern.
“Don’t leave me. Please. Not again.” She pleaded with actual tears in her eyes.
Juice swallowed back as Tara was clinging to him for dear life.
“I can fix this. Just stay. Don’t go.” Tara was beside herself and having a complete meltdown.
Juice drew back the deepest of breaths and found himself hugging her in return. He wasn’t even sure why. He just had a brief moment of pity.
“I’m sorry, Tara. I know this must be hard. But I’m not who you think I am. I think you need some help.”
Tara nodded and rested her head against his chest.
“I should’ve killed her… That’s what you wanted, right? Proof?”
“What are you talking about?”
“If I had killed her… You would’ve been proud of me and truly thought of me as your old lady. We could’ve buried her together. I know you love me. You wouldn’t let anything happen to me. That’s why I came back. I knew you’d keep me safe. And you did, you killed him. You’re always looking after me, Jax.”
Juice let out another uncomfortable laugh then pried himself free. He headed for the door and was about to make a mad dash, when he felt something strike him in the back. Juice cranked his head back in disbelief. Tara had that steak knife in hand and it was covered in his blood.
“What…” he started to say but she took that knife and stabbed him over and over again.
His eyes rolled into the back of his head and Tara was quick to brace him against her. She dropped the knife then brought him down on the floor. She had him cradled in her arms and was rocking him as she cried.
“I can’t let you leave, not again. Not ever again. I love you.”
“The usual, deputy?” The cashier questioned and Hale nodded.
He was on his way to Tara’s when he stopped and grabbed a cup of coffee. This had become a usual routine of his and had been, since he got Tara out of that psych ward a few weeks ago. She didn’t belong there. She was a doctor for crying out loud, a brilliant one at that. She was on her way to becoming one of the top surgeons in California. David knew she just needed sometime and she’d be back to her old self. It’d be a struggle, getting her medical license back, but he’d do whatever he could to help. It was tiring, this new life of his. But he’d much rather she be far away from that dreadful motorcycle club. It was because of them she was even admitted in the first place. Jackson Teller’s death… that was the final straw. Tara snapped and David was doing whatever he could to bring her back.
Those were his last thoughts, before he entered that house. His thoughts, BEFORE he saw the woman he once loved covered in blood and holding a body in her arms. She was rocking back and forth and kissing Juice?! David staggered back at the sight. Tara lifted her eyes once she took notice of his presence.
“I couldn’t let him leave, not again.” She smiled but tears continued on down her face.
She held Juice even tighter and David recoiled. He could’ve sworn he heard her whisper Jax’s name.
Opie regarded Happy and Tig after the meeting.
“Why don’t you two go and check on Juice? And Happy, do you mind covering for him? That way he can get a break. He’s gotta be going crazy. The thought hadn’t occurred to me until now. Still new to this guys…” He said and it seemed as if the thought hadn’t occurred to them either.
Each of them shared that look of shame.
“Oh man… You’re not the only one.” Tig uttered.
“Fuck…Tell the poor bastard I’ll make it up to him.”
“You got it brother.” Happy murmured before he and Tig headed off.
Bella looked to Jax in shock as he’d cum, yet again and was still going. She couldn’t believe how riled up this pregnancy had him. But something about it had the man going ninety to nothing. They were covered in sweat and she was filled to the brim. Still, he didn’t break stride and kept on thrusting. If she hadn’t known any better she’d swear he was making certain she was indeed knocked up. The mere idea made her want to laugh, but another orgasm hit and Bella’s knees started shaking.
“Jackson…” She pleaded as she wasn’t sure how much more she could take.
Now that was certainly different. Since when did she beg for him to stop?! It wasn’t that she wasn’t taking pleasure in this. But the girl was dying of thirst and she was tender to the touch. Jax lifted his head. Beads of sweat had formed along his face and that only added to her sensitivity. She loved seeing him all sweaty like that. There was just something highly erotic about it. Jax smiled as she hit another orgasm and was clawing the hell out of his back.
“Something wrong…” He seductively whispered then bit down on her earlobe.
“How are you still going?” She uttered thinking he himself should be raw.
He didn’t answer and was kissing all along her neck.
“Jackson please…” Her voice was hoarse.
His eyes locked with hers as he kept going.
“Even I need a break.”
“You sure?” He questioned with a grin.
Jax slowed down but gave a couple more deep thrust. Bella arched back and Jax ran a hand along her tummy. He couldn’t wait for her to start showing. There was just something about it. He wanted that belly and he wanted those beautiful breasts filled with milk. That’s what had him so hard and going strong. He could picture it. He was beginning to wonder if something was wrong with him. What man gets this hard, off the idea of your woman being pregnant? Jax shook his head as he had nothing left to give. He could feel it but there was just nothing left. He sighed and pulled out. There was a puddle of cum beneath her and this had him wiggling his brows.
“Well if you weren’t knocked up before. Then I damn sure got the job done this time!” He teased and Bella laughed on the irony of his words.
Jax rubbed her trembling knees.
“Sorry baby…” He whispered before kissing them.
Part of him wished she was already carrying his name. Bella Marie Teller… He thought amongst himself. And soon they’d have a little girl or boy carrying his name as well. With this thought, Jax lay beside her and pulled her into his arms. Both were struggling to catch their breath and that cold air hit their sweat covered bodies. Bella started shivering and Jax was quick to grab a nearby blanket and covered her up.
“We really should quit that…”
“You know… in the church.” She whispered and Jax died of laughter.
“It’s wrong…” She hissed and this had him laughing even harder.
“Oh Bella baby, it doesn’t matter where we fuck. He’s always watching. I think it’s safe to say he’s over it and has been. I mean you are knocked up. And I’m pretty sure it happened in this church, confessional booth, nevertheless. Now that’s sinnin’ at it’s finest!”
“Jackson…” She groaned but with a giggle.
“If it makes you feel better you did say his name a lot…”
“Just sayin’.” He taunted and kissed the top of her head.
“And just so you know… it’s a girl.” He added with a shrug.
“And you know this, how?!”
“Alright then… what’s her name?” She further challenged.
“Hope Amanda Teller.”
Bella regarded her husband-to-be in amazement.
“That sure was quick…”
He shrugged on this.
“Just came to me. Not sure why.”
“I love it.” Bella said with a smile.
“But what if it’s a boy?!”
“But what if…?”
“Hmmm…” Jax hummed in thought.
“Gunner John Teller.”
Bella looked to him in surprise once again.
“You’ve really put some thought into this.”
“Not really. Just spur the moment names.”
“Well guess I don’t need to add to anything.”
“Come on darlin’. If you have something picked out tell me. That’s the fun of it!”
“That’s just it, I don’t. I happen to like what you’ve picked out. Just took me by surprise is all.”
“So what you’re saying is… we’ve already got names.” He uttered with a smirk and Bella sort of laughed.
“I suppose we do.” She grabbed a bottle of water and downed it, while Jax had himself a smoke.
“We might have to hit the pond again…” He taunted as to how sweaty they were.
“Funny…” Bella murmured with a frown.
The air was cold enough that it was already airing them off. A slight chill came over her and Jax handed his hoodie over.
“What will Abel think?” She softly questioned as she pulled the hoodie over her head.
Jax smiled in thought.
“He’ll probably think it’s awesome, being a big brother and all.”
“I hope so…” Bella said but with this gloomy presence.
“I miss him too…”
Bella teared up a bit and Jax held her against his chest.
“I hope he’s adjusting okay. He’s been through so much.” Bella cried and that melted Jax’s heart.
He loved just how much she cared when it came to his son. She truly was the mother Abel deserved.
“I’m sure he’s fine. A little sad but fine. Mom’s great with that kind of stuff. I’m sure she’s keeping him pretty distracted. That’s how she was when we lost Thomas. She didn’t give me much time to think on it.”
“But he hasn’t lost us.”
“I know baby. But to him it might feel like it, at least until he sees us again.” Jax wasn’t about to sugar coat it. Bella needed to be prepared for when they saw him again. He doubted Abel would forget them. But that wasn’t to say he wouldn’t seem a little different, or distant even, at first. It might take a bit for their little family to rebuild. But Jax would do whatever he could to get them there.
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